Refusing to listen, especially when something is perceived as a demand, is an issue for neurodivergent and neurotypical teens alike. Parents know that refusing to listen (especially to authority figures) can happen even when it’s least expected. Defiance—as normal as it is for teens—can get out of hand, though. And sometimes, it’s the symptom of something like oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) or even autism.
Is It ODD or ASD?
The lines between ODD and autism spectrum disorder (ASD) are not clear. Tantrums and constant refusal to cooperate are shared behaviors of both, and the conditions frequently co-occur. The behavioral issues your teen with is dealing might stem from ODD, ASD, both, or neither.
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Children and teens with ODD are uncooperative and defiant; sometimes, they’re even hostile or aggressive toward authority figures. They often question rules and misinterpret the intent of a situation or request, potentially even reading neutral situations as hostile ones they need to guard against. Exposure to abuse, inconsistent or ineffective punishment, and a lack of structure are risk factors for children developing ODD.
Autism Spectrum Disorder
Self-injury, tantrums, and aggression are common behavioral issues among people with autism, especially during adolescence. They also frequently refuse to listen, which might stem from avoiding something they don’t want to do or that upsets them. Autistic people tend to be inflexible in the way they think and have a harder time with social cues and communication. They might defy a request just because they don’t pick up on the cue that everyone else in a group is obeying it or feel like they’re being scrutinized and get upset if they’re pressed to follow the original instruction, which can lead to an outburst.
They Can Be Co-Occurring Conditions
Some research has shown that around a quarter of autistic children and younger adolescents also met the DSM-IV (a previous diagnostic manual for mental health clinicians) criteria for ODD. Similar research has also shown that ODD is also common among people with another neurodivergent condition, ADHD.
For both professionals and parents, it might be impossible to tell if it’s ODD, ASD, or both. What matters is that you recognize the issues and take steps to help your teen. Treatment can make a meaningful impact on their life, especially as they start becoming more independent.
Meaningful Treatment Can Help
Regardless of the source of your teen’s behavioral issues, you can find support. At Family First, we know that teens aren’t acting out just because; there’s something deeper that they’re living with, and we’ll help them explore it. We never use punishment to try and “correct” behaviors. Instead, we take an individualized approach that includes:
- Evaluation – Even if your teen’s symptoms overlap between ODD and ASD or another neurodevelopmental condition, a thorough evaluation will help us figure out the right treatment approach for them.
- Personalized therapy – We use a mix of evidence-based and holistic therapies in individual and group settings. Your teen’s therapy plan will include some that are proven to help with their diagnoses.
- Skills teaching – Autistic teens can benefit from learning more about social cues, and being more aware can make it easier for them to go with the flow. Adaptive skills can help teens with ODD and/or ASD become more accepting of direction and resilient in their independence.
- Family support – We’ll work closely with you and other family members to help you better understand your teen’s mental health so you can create a more supportive environment at home where they can practice following instructions and respecting boundaries.
- Coordination with educators – Support at school might include accommodations, special education services, classroom behavioral management strategies, and more. We can collaborate with your teen’s educators and administrators so they can be even more successful at school.
Lashing out and defying rules will happen, but when it happens regularly, it’s time to find help. Don’t try to tough it out or wait. Call 888.904.5947 or contact Family First online.