When your teen is newly identified as neurodivergent, it shifts how you understand their behaviors and your role as a parent. What once felt confusing can start to make more sense, but that doesn’t mean everything falls into place overnight. You might feel like you’re learning a new language, now adjusting your expectations, and rethinking how to approach situations. It’s not about fixing what was never broken—it’s about discovering new ways to connect, advocate, and grow together. And while the journey may look different from what you imagined, it’s still meaningful and can be full of progress.
This guide will help you recognize which neurodivergent symptoms and behaviors are more likely to cause issues at home or school. You’ll also learn some ways to make routines easier to stick with and the types of accommodations you might need to make within your family and with teachers.
First Things First: The Neurodiversity Movement
“Neurodiversity” is an umbrella term that describes everyone—including both neurodivergent and neurotypical people. Rather than framing neurodivergent conditions as “disorders” or issues that need to be “fixed,” the neurodiversity movement considers them as different ways of thinking.
Life on the Spectrum as a Neurodivergent Person
The spectrum references the range of neurodevelopmental disorders. People on the spectrum sometimes feel embarrassed about their differences and try to hide who they are to fit in. Some have a hard time with speech, motor skills, hygiene, and paying attention. Symptoms can range from moderately impairing, where someone just needs to learn new skills, to severe, where someone may need lifelong assistance.
What Is Neurodivergence?
Neurodivergence refers to how people’s brains work differently from the standard. It shows up in ways regarding sociability, learning, attention, mood, and other mental functions. What does that mean? Neurodivergent people can have a hard time interacting with others, controlling how they feel, paying attention, and just functioning in “normal” situations. Not because they want to stand out, act out, or be difficult—but because they have neurological differences.
Types of Neurodivergent Disorders
- Autism spectrum disorder (ASD): Affects communication, social interaction, and sensory processing, often accompanied by repetitive behaviors and unique cognitive strengths.
- Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD): Characterized by challenges with attention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity, often leading to difficulties in organization, time management, and focus.
- Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD): Involves persistent, intrusive thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors or mental acts (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety.
- Tourette syndrome: Involves involuntary movements and vocal tics, which can range from mild to severe and may fluctuate over time.
- Dyslexia and dysgraphia: And other learning differences impact reading (dyslexia) and writing (dysgraphia), affecting skills like decoding words, spelling, handwriting, and written expression.
- Sensory processing disorder: Difficulty receiving and responding to sensory input, leading to hypersensitivity (over-responsiveness) or hyposensitivity (under-responsiveness) to stimuli like sound, touch, or movement.
Common Neurodivergent Behaviors
You (and your child’s teachers) have probably noticed behaviors that get in the way of their life. Whether it’s trouble getting along with others or just paying attention, these behavioral issues aren’t just acting out; they’re due to brain differences.
Attention Issues
Teens with ADHD or similar conditions have attention issues. They can find it challenging to focus on tasks that are not interesting or stimulating to them, especially if their surroundings are distracting. On the flip side, they might hyperfocus on something they enjoy—spending hours immersed in an activity without noticing the time pass. These attention challenges can impact schoolwork and daily routines, but with support, teens can develop skills to improve their focus across the board.
Stimming
Stimming, or self-stimulating behavior, is a common way for ADHD or autistic people to manage their emotions or sensory experiences. Stimming can include repetitive movements like rocking, hand-flapping, or tapping. These behaviors may help adolescents feel calm or regulate overwhelming feelings. While stimming might seem unusual to others, it serves an important purpose in managing internal experiences, which can lead to fewer tantrums. Recognizing when stimming is more appropriate—or finding a new stimming behavior that’s less disruptive—can help minimize interruptions.
Selective or Picky Eating
Many neurodivergent adolescents experience selective or picky eating due to sensory sensitivities. Certain textures, tastes, or smells can be overwhelming, making it difficult for them to eat a variety of foods. It’s important for parents to approach this behavior with patience, offering new foods gradually and respecting their teen’s preferences without pressure. Professional support from occupational or nutrition therapists can help expand a teen’s diet over time and ensure they’re getting the nutrition that keeps them healthy.
Impulsivity
Impulsivity is another common behavior seen in neurodivergent teens. They may make decisions without thinking about the consequences or act on urges quickly, which can include talking over others or interrupting. This can create challenges at school, at home, and in social settings. The goal of treatment is not to eliminate impulsivity but to teach coping mechanisms and tools to manage it better—turning it into a positive energy for creativity and action.
Special Interests
Neurodivergent people often have strong interests or passions to which they dedicate significant time and energy. This could be anything from art, video games, science, or a specific show. While it’s important to encourage variety in activities, strong interests can be a great source of motivation and joy—and even lead to future career opportunities.
Challenges You’ll Face with Your Neurodivergent Teen
Neurodiversity is such a wide range (literally encompassing all people) that symptoms of neurodevelopmental conditions vary greatly from person to person. Symptoms can be more intense for some and will pose unique challenges in their daily lives.
For example, an autistic teen might struggle most with social cues, causing them to have a hard time making friends or even talking to you at home. A teen with ADHD might love socializing but struggle to finish their chores at home or remind you when there’s a class project due tomorrow. The challenges you face with your teen will be unique, too, so be patient and work with them to overcome them together.
What You and Your Teen Might Notice
Challenges | What You Might Notice |
Social Skills |
|
Communication |
|
Sensory Overload |
|
Emotional Regulation |
|
Repetitive Behaviors |
|
Masking |
|
Executive Functioning |
|
Impulsivity/Hyperactivity |
|
Motor Skills |
|
Academic Challenges |
|
The Risk of Co-Occurring Mental Health Conditions
Neurodivergent people are more likely to have a co-occurring mental health condition. In fact, some research has shown that about 40% of autistic adults deal with depression at least once and are more likely to have suicidal thoughts or attempt suicide than non-autistic people. Neurodivergent people can also struggle with issues like social anxiety, anger issues, self-harm, and more—any of which may be easier to trigger than in neurotypical people.
Why is there so much overlap? It’s not completely clear yet. One major factor is the emotional toll that masking (trying to fit in with neurotypical peers) has on ADHD and autistic people. Another might be impulsive behaviors or social issues, like bullying and loneliness. Lack of support—or lack of willingness to accept support—can also play a part.
What You Can Do at Home
Adjusting your home and routine can provide comfort, consistency, and support—for both your teen and you.
Parenting Your Teen
- Support emotional regulation: Create calm spaces and learn de-escalation strategies.
- Break tasks into steps: Use checklists or timers for schoolwork or chores.
- Advocate in school: Ask about 504 evaluations, individual education plans (IEPs), and/or classroom accommodations.
- Encourage healthy stimming: Offer fidget tools or movement breaks.
- Celebrate their interests: Use passions as a tool for growth and confidence.
- Keep conversations open: Let them know home is a safe space to share.
Supporting yourself
- Practice self-care: Prioritize rest, therapy, or join support groups to prevent burnout.
- Learn about neurodivergence: Read, listen, or attend talks to better understand your teen.
- Adjust expectations: Focus on progress, not perfection.
- Communicate calmly: Avoid yelling or sarcasm; offer clear, simple choices.
- Create consistent routines: Visual schedules, timers, or checklists can help you and your teen stay on track.
- Use your support network: Lean on therapists, educators, friends, and family when you need them.
Sometimes, You’ll Need Some More Support
Navigating the world as a neurodivergent teen is challenging, and it’s as uniquely challenging for parents and caregivers. Finding support is crucial for both you and your child.
When you’re seeking support, there are a few things to keep in mind. Look for professionals who specialize in neurodevelopmental conditions and have experience working with teens. Also, consider the supportive resources available at your child’s school or through community organizations. Your family might benefit from:
Occupational Therapy
Occupational therapy (OT) is a type of therapy that helps people develop the skills and abilities they need to perform daily tasks and activities. For neurodivergent teens, occupational therapists can help with developing sensory processing skills, finding new ways to learn more effectively, and self-care practices like hygiene.
Social Skills Training
Social skills groups are a great way for neurodivergent teens to interact with others who have similar challenges. These groups provide an opportunity for your child to learn appropriate social behaviors and practice them in a safe and supportive environment.
Behavioral Therapy
Behavioral therapy is a type of therapy that focuses on modifying behavior by identifying triggers and finding ways to manage them. This can be especially helpful for teens with behavioral issues related to their neurodivergence.
Parent Support Groups
You have to take care of yourself to best support your child. Parent support groups provide a safe space for you to share experiences, get advice from other parents, and find comfort in knowing you’re not alone in the journey of raising a neurodivergent teen.
A treatment center that offers family support for parents and teens can be a great all-in-one resource. The Family First team will work with your unique challenges and provide evidence-based treatment for your teen to help the whole family thrive.
Turn to the experts at Family First when you need help
When your teen is diagnosed with autism, ADHD, or another neurodevelopmental condition, it’s normal to feel uncertain about what comes next. You want to support them but may not know how—or where to turn.
That’s where The Nest program comes in.
At Family First, we know your teen doesn’t need to be “fixed.” They need a space where their brain is understood, their strengths are celebrated, and they’re taught the real-world skills that make independence possible.
The Nest is a residential treatment program built just for neurodivergent boys ages 12–18. Here, we focus on what matters most to families like yours:
- Neurodiversity-affirming care: Rooted in compassion, not compliance, with experienced therapists and highly trained ASD Clinical Specialists who engage in over 200 hours of clinical supervision and training every year.
- Executive functioning coaching: Support for planning, organizing, and staying focused as teens prepare for adulthood.
- Advocacy training: We teach teens how to speak up for their needs in school, work, and life.
- Life skills development: From hygiene to communication to career readiness, we help teens feel confident and capable.
- Academic support: Our team collaborates with tutors and schools to deliver flexible, individualized learning that promotes educational progress.
- Family involvement and coaching: We offer therapy, education, and immersive retreats to help families grow and heal together.
Call Family First Adolescent Services at 888.904.5947 or complete our online form to find out if neurodevelopmental treatment at our South Florida center is right for your teen.
Adolescence can be a challenging time for both teens and their families, especially for those who think or behave differently from their peers. Neurodivergent teens—like those with ADHD or autism spectrum disorder (ASD)—navigate the world in unique ways, which can sometimes be misunderstood by others. Many common neurodivergent behaviors are the result of frustration or under- or overstimulation. Often, they’re ways to self-soothe or try and learn in a world that challenges how they think.
What is neurodivergence?
Neurodivergence refers to cognitive differences that diverge from typical neurological patterns. It is one aspect of neurodiversity which encompasses the full spectrum of how people think and process information. Neurodivergent people experience and interact with the world in ways that differ from neurotypical patterns, which align more closely with conventional ways of thinking and functioning.
Types of neurodivergent disorders
There’s a wide range of neurodivergent traits, like attention, behavioral, and sensory issues, that can span multiple neurodevelopmental conditions. However, each is a little different.
- Autism spectrum disorder – Affects communication, social interaction, and sensory processing, often accompanied by repetitive behaviors and unique cognitive strengths.
- ADHD – Characterized by challenges with attention, impulsivity, and hyperactivity, often leading to difficulties in organization, time management, and focus.
- Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) – Involves persistent, intrusive thoughts (obsessions) and repetitive behaviors or mental acts (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety.
- Tourette syndrome – Involves involuntary movements and vocal tics, which can range from mild to severe and may fluctuate over time.
- Dyslexia and dysgraphia – Learning differences that impact reading (dyslexia) and writing (dysgraphia), affecting skills like decoding words, spelling, handwriting, and written expression.
- Sensory processing disorder – Difficulty receiving and responding to sensory input, leading to hypersensitivity (over-responsiveness) or hyposensitivity (under-responsiveness) to stimuli like sound, touch, or movement.
If your teen is neurodivergent, even if they have a specific diagnosis, they might deal with symptoms that seem like they fit more neatly under another umbrella. But the reality is that neurodivergent traits don’t always fit neatly under one name.
5 common neurodivergent behaviors
If you’ve noticed—or one of your child’s teachers has brought up—new behaviors in your teen that seem different or challenging, it’s possible they could have undiagnosed ADHD, ASD, or sensory processing issues. While every adolescent is unique, these traits are often seen in neurodivergent people.
1. Attention issues
Teens with ADHD or similar conditions may struggle with attention issues. They can find it challenging to focus on tasks that are not interesting or stimulating to them, especially if the environment is distracting. On the flip side, they might hyperfocus on something they enjoy—spending hours immersed in an activity without noticing the time pass. These attention challenges can impact schoolwork and daily routines, but with support, teens can develop skills to improve their focus.
2. Stimming
Stimming, or self-stimulating behavior, is a common way for neurodivergent teens to manage their emotions or sensory experiences. Stimming can include repetitive movements like rocking, hand-flapping, or tapping. These behaviors may help adolescents feel calm or regulate overwhelming feelings. While stimming might seem unusual to others, it serves an important purpose in managing internal experiences, which can lead to fewer tantrums. Recognizing when stimming is more appropriate—or finding a new stimming behavior that’s less disruptive—can help minimize disruptions.
3. Selective or picky eating
Many neurodivergent adolescents experience selective or picky eating due to sensory sensitivities. Certain textures, tastes, or smells can be overwhelming, making it difficult for them to eat a variety of foods. It’s important for parents to approach this behavior with patience, offering new foods gradually and respecting their teen’s preferences without pressure. Professional support from occupational or nutrition therapists can help expand a teen’s diet over time as well as ensuring they’re getting the nutrition that keeps them healthy.
4. Impulsivity
Impulsivity is another common behavior seen in neurodivergent teens. They may make decisions without thinking about the consequences or act on urges quickly, which can include talking over others or interrupting. This can create challenges at school, at home, and in social settings. The goal of treatment is not to eliminate impulsivity but to teach coping mechanisms and tools to manage it better—turning it into a positive energy for creativity and action.
5. Strong interests
Neurodivergent adolescents often have strong interests or passions to which dedicate significant time and energy. This could be anything from art, video games, science, or a specific show. While it’s important to encourage variety in activities, strong interests can be a great source of motivation and joy—and even lead to future career opportunities.
Celebrate neurodiversity at Family First
At Family First, we believe that neurodivergent behaviors are not deficits but differences that should be celebrated and opportunities for growth. Our neurodevelopmental treatment helps teens learn to navigate the world around them while embracing the things that make them unique. We also provide family support to help parents understand more about how their child thinks, acts, and feels so that they can help their teen as they go through adolescence into adulthood. Call 888.904.5947 or contact us online now to get started.
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